How you inform your child you are getting a divorce is crucial. You need to be careful to minimize the effects of the news on them. Your child’s age is integral to how you raise the matter, as children process information differently based on their maturity level.
If your child is a teenager, their cognitive ability has developed. Thus, they likely understand how the divorce might affect their lives. Accordingly, they may be more emotional.
Below are two tips to employ when telling your teenager about your divorce:
1. Do it together
If possible, both parents need to be present during the initial divorce conversation when talking to kids of any age. This is because it shows a united front. When your child knows you are on the same page about the divorce, they may feel less anxious.
Further, talking to your child together can reassure them that you are still a family, even though its dynamics are about to change, which can provide a sense of stability.
2. Be prepared for strong reactions
Teenagers often tend to attribute blame to themselves when something happens at home. If you tell your teenager you are getting a divorce, they may believe their behavior or a recent mistake may have contributed to the divorce. Make sure to tell them they are not to blame in any way.
Accordingly, it’s not uncommon for teenagers to have strong emotions upon learning of their parents’ divorce. They may feel angry, anxious, shocked, stressed, confused or depressed. You should be ready for such emotions during and after the conversation. Come up with ways to help your child manage them.
Talking to a teenager about a divorce should be handled with care. Learn more to understand the best ways to initiate the conversation with your child to help them cope with their new reality.